Bread and Circuses
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Archive for January, 2007
January 20, 2007 at 9:59 am · Filed under Uncategorized
The college basketball season is half over and people are barely starting to pay attention. The conference races are starting to shape up, and the best teams are coming into focus. So how come very few fans really care yet? Because March Madness breeds January Just-Waiting. We’re all just waiting on the tournament.
Complain as we must about college football, it clearly has the most meaningful regular season of any sport. Lose and your season may well be over. The NCAA basketball tournament, on the other hand, will be taking teams from the major conferences that will struggle to .500 records and not come close to winning 20 games. So right now, with my Hogs sitting 1-3 in the conference, I don’t even have to panic yet. Just put together a nice run at the end of the season and they’ll make the dance. Even if they stink all year, they could put it together in the conference tournament and snag the automatic bid. Not likely, but possible.
So, rather than worry about the top 25 or other such meaningless things, I’ll just state some observations I’ve made about the season so far.
1. Florida is the team to beat. Sorry, Wisconsin fans but the Gators would spank you.
2. Kevin Durant is better than Greg Odom. If you haven’t seen the kid from Texas play, he’s sensational.
3. The Pac 10 is far and away the best conference, with the SEC a distant 2nd. This bodes well for the Pac -10 come tourney time. The West coast teams will be battle tested and hard to beat.
4. Coach of the year so far -Tubby Smith. Kentucky has very average talent, but they’re playing great.
That’s it. Wake me up in about a month when games start to really matter.
23 Comments
Original post by Bread and Circuses
January 18, 2007 at 9:26 am · Filed under Uncategorized
Okay, we’ve all posted on the need for a definitive way to determine who plays in college football’s championship game. As I look back at the ‘06 season, I think we need to learn from what worked and apply it to the coming year. I’ve toyed with some of these ideas on message boards and in comments on others’ blogs, but it’s time to set the whole thing down for your discerning input and criticisms.
This past season, after all the games had been played and it was time to decide who would play OSU, Urban Meyer blazed a trail that worked so well I think it should become a permanent part of the process:
THE HEAD COACH PI$$ING CONTEST
Let’s look at how it worked in 2006. The first coach to start pi$$ing was actually Tommy Tuberville of Auburn. Fearing another result like 2004, and knowing the difficulty of going unscathed through the tough SEC, Tommy started pi$$ing about the SEC’s perceived disadvantages in October. Unfortunately for him, Arkansas stomped the pi$$ out of him, and he was eliminated from the contest.
Next came Meyer. Starting a full week before the final vote to determine if Florida would be in, he stood at midfield, split the uprights, and pi$$ed nonstop for four days. Very impressive indeed. Lloyd Carr, meanwhile seemed unable to find his whizzer, and waited until the contest was pretty much decided before even beginning to pi$$. He never had a chance. Tresell at OSU took the high road, refusing to pi$$ because he didn’t want to offend anyone. The contest produced the desired result, because Florida was obviously deserving of the championship game.
The only thing left to do, then, is to formalize the rules for future years. First, as HalfBaked suggested, it should be televised, with Flomax as chief sponsor. "The Flomax head Coaches Pi$$Off." All coaches would stand at midfield and begin their streams simultaneously. Points would be awarded for distance, accuracy and volume. In deference to Pete Carroll, style points would be considered. Everyone knows Carrol has a flair about him, and I’m sure no other coach would seem to enjoy the contest as much as him. Also, to pacify Notre Dame, Charlie Weiss would be allowed to move 15 yards closer and pi$$ from the 35. If he finishes in the top 4 pi$$ers, ND is automatically in the championship game.
Another concern would be drug testing, How to perform the testing without diminishing the coaches volume would be a critical component, but the last thing we need is charges of someone using pi$$ enhancers.
So there you have it. The final word in determining the BCS championship teams. Coaches with prostate problems need not apply.
29 Comments
Original post by Bread and Circuses
January 17, 2007 at 9:55 am · Filed under Uncategorized
Poor Gus Malzahn. The recently relocated former offensive coordinator for the Arkansas Razorbacks has moved on. To Tulsa. (That’s in Oklahoma, I checked.) Malzahn apparently was unhappy about the opportunity he was given to move directly from high school to a coordinator’s position in the SEC. Seems he was misled. He understood that he would be given complete control of all players, game plans, and slush funds, as well as keys to the cheerleader’s shower. Instead all he got to do was gain unheard of experience for someone with no college coaching experience.
Now Mitch Mustain, the second half of the M&M team (Mistreated &Maligned) has announced that he too is leaving. Mustain was a five star recruit, the #1 QB coming out of high school. And he had already shown an uncanny ability to throw the timely unforced interception that we Arkansas fans don’t usually expect to see until a players second or third year in the system. Mitch’s stats were impressive. He completed half of his passes for an amazing 900 yards, with only nine interceptions in eight starts. He obviously should have been allowed to throw more. Darren McFadden be damned, we’re talking major NFL talent here.
The M&M team (Misled & Manipulated) will now continue their amazing careers at a mid-major school with a history of being a coaching carousel. Sounds like a perfect fit. Arkansas, meanwhile will try to pick up the pieces and figure out how in the world they’re going to win in 2007 with only 15 returning starters, including McFadden, Felix Jones and Marcus Monk. Hey…….maybe if we run the ball…..
28 Comments
Original post by Bread and Circuses